Writer, Facilitator + Consultant

How to make the best decisions for your business

In life and business there are many paths to success, and countless decisions to make along the journey.

There are many strategies, steps and tips that are great advice. And if you don’t know how to move forward then it’s smart to take it upon yourself to learn the different strategies, steps, and tips out there.

Many of them work. But not all tips will work for all people all the time. Some tips work for some people some of the time.

And anybody who says – “Listen to me, Follow me — I have the answers, and only my way can take you to what you desire” that’s the person you need to stay far away from. In other words, anyone who calls themselves a guru – stay away.

It’s sad because the word guru has been misconstrued. Guru is supposed to simply mean “taking away the darkness”

But in this day and age the word guru is used to mean a teacher you follow no matter what. Like a cult-like worship of a teacher.

It means following a teacher’s every word, teaching, and request even when your heart knows something isn’t quite right. Even when they tell you something obscene. Even when they tell you something that intuitively doesn’t feel right, because if you follow a guru, you follow everything—and this is detrimental.

Anybody who initiates themselves as the guru, as the one with all the answers is taking away from you the most important gift you have: Your Personal Power.

Your personal power is your ability to consult with your inner teacher, your inner guidance and to decide for yourself what is true, what is right.

Honoring your personal power means giving yourself permission to make your own decisions. And this is how you’ll make the best decisions for your business: trusting your own inner guidance and discernment.

I’ve had many great teachers in my life, but I don’t always believe or agree with everything they say, even when I think highly of them. And the teachers who’ve been my favorite are the ones that are confident and courageous enough to say “Only listen to what I say if it feels right to you”

It’s dangerous to give away your power to someone else.

Often you can end up giving away your values, and self-respect when you get too deep into following a teacher without taking a time to pause and reflect inside yourself if your internal GPS agrees with what you’ve been taught.

It’s important to learn new things, but whenever you learn, take a moment to pause at the end, and reflect on the teaching.

Take some time to feel and decide for yourself – which of these teachings do you believe and agree with deep in your heart, and which of them do you feel iffy or unsure about?

It’s OK not to believe everything you’re taught even if it’s from someone you highly respect. That’s one of the most important times to take a moment and pause and decide for yourself if you agree.

As a side note, when you don’t agree with something, that’s a magical moment where you get to harness your unique stance on a subject matter. It’s where innovation and creativity comes from. It’s when you hear an idea and think to yourself “Hey – something is missing here, or something isn’t quite right here. Here’s how I would do it differently and I’m gonna’ share it”

When you take time to reflect on what you’ve learned and decide for yourself what you’ll receive and what you’ll throw away—you become magical in your business and life. You set your own rules, call your own shots, and really become BOSS. You start to create innovative products and services and have something truly unique to give, teach, and share.

You may love a certain celebrity-marketer, but if they tell you to try a certain strategy that doesn’t feel right to you, don’t blindly follow them.

If you love a certain spiritual teacher who tells you to sing a certain mantra, but that simply doesn’t feel right to you — don’t do it.

Look – the best teachings and best advice on the planet are the ones where deep inside you feel like – aha! Yes! That feels SO right. Or there’s a sense like somehow deep inside you knew that message already, or there’s this feeling of “Oh my god, this is the answer I’ve been waiting for”

Sometimes your favorite teachers will say things that you don’t agree with (I’ve had it happen many times)

In those moments, remember to stay away from the guru-mentality. Do not worship anybody or anything. Trust yourself. Trust your inner guidance to connect you with what’s right and true.

You know, it’s the guru-type following that sadly leads to events like the Jonestown massacre, or the followers of Castaneda who gave away their money and body to his manipulative ways.

Did Castaneda have powerful teachings to share? Sure. Are there great tidbits of information you can gather from his books? Certainly. But his guru-like teachings led to manipulation and control of his followers. He used his celebrity best-selling author status to manipulate his followers who gave away their power to him leading to much trouble and deaths of many of his devout followers.

The most important lesson we can learn from Castaneda is even if somebody inspires you through their teachings—don’t give your power away.

Wherever or whomever you’re learning from, whether it’s business or life – stay away from anyone who makes you feel like you must follow their every word, or as if they know better than you what’s best for you. Stay away from anyone who tries to manipulate you to follow their ways.

Keep your power, and trust your inner guidance to guide you.

Be willing to drop a teaching the moment your inner teacher says “That’s not right”

When you learn something—receive the teachings that feel right and makes sense to you. Be willing to release that which doesnt jive with your values and inner “YES!”

Sometimes we need to test and try new strategies and tips to see what we really think and feel about them.

The moment you take action and receive feedback (because there is always feedback from every action you take)—listen well. Take time to reflect.

And if something doesn’t feel right, change course, and allow the teacher inside of you to guide you the rest of the way.

9 comments… add one
  • Donovan August 28, 2014,

    “And anybody who says – “Listen to me, Follow me — I have the answers, and only my way can take you to what you desire” — that’s the person you need to stay far away from”

    I find it such a turn off when someone says that. And to me, I think it maybe has fear behind it. They think if they don’t market
    like that, no one will buy. Granted, some of those people ARE making a fortune…
    but there is a lot more to Serving this world than just making money, and helping other people make money…like one of my mentors
    said, ‘Well, making music is great…but who will feed the poor and house the homeless?’

    The Buddhists say, ‘Watch your motivation’. The selfish motivation moves us to ask, ‘how can i get?’ and then we ride that into certain actions.
    And the selfless motivation asks, ‘how can i help?’ and then we ride that into certain actions.
    But the selfless one has Power behind it – Love – the Will to Serve. Both of them can make money, but the second one works
    hard and diligently to make this planet a better place…and the rewards of that go way beyond just bucks.
    The first one is kinda lazy and self-centred…. Eckhart Tolle even goes so far as to call it ‘cleverness’ as in ‘the ego is clever, but it is not intelligent.’
    ‘cleverness pursues it own little aims.’

    Reply
    • Tova Payne August 29, 2014,

      Wow Donovan, thank you for your thoughtful words and adding to this conversation 🙂

      Reply

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